Welcome to the newest edition of The Why. “Why do girls never want nice guys?” you ask? Good question. While yours truly once wrote a “Dr. Love” column he doesn’t have all the answers when it comes to women. In fact, he has very few. Luckily, decades of life experience has enabled your randy writer to learn a bit about this one.
Yes, early in life it might appear that girls don’t want nice guys. They want “bad boys”. It’s a fact of life . . . or so it seems. To tell the truth, girls do want nice guys.
Unfortunately, it usually is not until they learn the truth about “bad boys”. For some of them it doesn’t kick in until they have gone through a bad marriage or three, a divorce or two and perhaps even an eating disorder or substance addiction issue.
To a lot of girls “nice” means “weak”. Nice means “boring.” A bad boy seems more manly than a nice guy. Girls want excitement. They want mystery, surprise and drama. (Yeah, it takes a bad boy or two before they learn that drama can be a bad thing.)
Initially though, the bad boy is all attitude, carelessness, isolation, self-indulgence and selfishness. One thing that leads to is a sense of mystery and excitement. These personality traits play on a girl’s psyche.
(Consequently this also teaches boys that being bad is better than being good. This teaches boys that being a bad boy gets you more hokey-pokey time while being a nice guy either gets you abused, ignored or added to the dreaded “Friends List.” (No, there are no “benefits” for those on this list.)
Girls perceive a nice guy as weaker than the bad boy who flaunts his so-called “strength”. They feel it is acceptable to use a nice guy and leave him hanging. Nice guys are easy to handle but bad boys are a challenge.
While this might seem weird you need to remember we’re talking about girls here. Maybe sometimes girls enjoy the chase more than actually immediately having a relationship.
Maybe sometimes girls like to think they have the power to change a bad boy when nice guys are pretty much ready-made. Maybe it’s the fact that a pseudo-relationship is oft’times flashier. Hang in there though, guys, because as you get a little older your stock goes up.
So chin up, chum. Save your money. Stay in shape. If girls keep clinging to the bad boys someday soon the nice guy will be an endangered species in a world of @**holes.
Why do girls never want nice guys? Now you know.
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